Are you building other people's dreams? #37
Hey all, and happy Friday.
Here we are, issue #37.
Just before we jump in, I wanted to say more and more people have reached out recently, either over Messenger or LinkedIn and just said ‘hi’. Some are people I’ve met face to face before, and some are first-time contacts - either way, it’s been great and it’s been nice just to chat.
So, don’t be a stranger - the easiest way to start a conversation is - ‘hey I read your newsletter - <here are my general thoughts/questions/etc>’.
Anyways, on with this week’s issue…
Are you building other people’s dreams?
This is a question that has been on my mind for some time.
One reason is, that it largely bothers me that we (I) might be just a cog in the big machine, someone else’s big machine.
This is also coupled with the notion that - you only live one short life.
But the second reason this is on my mind is the realisation that it is NOT a mutually exclusive approach.
And I think understanding both elements is a small step to some form of freedom.
As always, let me explain with a story…
The Audi R8
The Audi R8. It is a lovely car and the first time I heard they even existed was in a meeting with one of my old bosses, for context, my boss was the head of accounting for a manufacturing company.
The boss and I were talking about some technical stuff, we were implementing a new ERP system into the business. Halfway through the meeting, the managing director (MD) walked in and abruptly said to my boss (the head of accounting) - “how’s things?”. My boss replied, with a serious look on her face - “not great, cashflow looks bad for the next month - we just need to watch our spending”. The MD, without even a pause, did a 180 turn, and as he walked out of the office he shouted over his shoulder “as long as there is enough for my car!”.
Over the next couple of months, the company went through restructuring to reduce operating costs, and people lost their jobs. And the MD got his new car, an Audi R8.
Today an Audi R8 price starts at £143,735.
Now this isn’t a salty post against the capitalist way of the world. It is simply an observation. But it was the literal example of the meme shown above. So yeah, these memes are real and happen.
Someone else’s dream
So the MD in the previous example got the Audi R8. He also has a £1,000,000+ home, a jet ski, and a 2nd car (Range Rover) and was able to start work at 10am and leave before 2pm.
90% of his employees were on minimum wage.
This theme has been common throughout my career but perhaps not as extreme.
It is common, in companies I have worked for, for the owners to work a 10am to 2pm day. It is common for a large disparity in pay and conditions between those at the top and those at the bottom.
And again, this isn’t that salty post against the capitalist way of the world - it is purely an observation that some people build structures and systems which facilitate the building of their dream life and lifestyle. And some people become a cog in those systems.
The good news is that building structures and systems to build your dream is possible. We see it all around us.
The bad news is, if you (we) don’t figure it out then we might commit our very finite life to building someone else’s dream.
The reality of it
Earlier in my career I didn’t have the luxury of having these thoughts.
Following my dreams was for other people.
I had to work to pay the bills.
The job, with the MD and the Audi R8 - I hated it there. I was one of those people to get ‘restructured’, and to be honest - it was for the best. It was tough after and I struggled and even took a step back in my career - but that happens.
But when I was in that company, and the company after - I didn’t have the luxury of aligning my dreams with my day job.
During those times I had a newborn baby and a wife on maternity leave - and my purpose (and by default my dream) was to cover the financial responsibilities. [see Maslow Hierarchy - I was operating at the bottom levels - no room for self-actualisation]
That’s just life (or at least that part of my life).
And that is like some of us now, maybe most of us. We have an obligation to just get on with it, to work to pay the bills.
The solution
I know what you are expecting me to write here.
You’re expecting me to say - start your own business.
Yeah, go and do that..!
But that’s not for everyone, it’s not everyone’s dream, and we have to acknowledge that.
So what is the alternative?
When I joined Meta, 2 things motivated me.
First, money!
Second - well I did my prep work. I watched a Zuck talk where he talked about connecting people in the world. One thing jumped out - something like (I am paraphrasing here) “for every 10 people we connect in the world we lift 1 person out of poverty” - I loved that, I bought into the dream.
We’d referred to people like me as “drinks the Kool-aid”.
And also the job helped me fulfil some of my dreams…
I always wanted to work in big tech on big problems
I wanted to try living in a different country
I wanted to travel
I wanted to be able to look after my family (financially)
I wanted to learn to sail and buy a boat
So by working at Meta, I got to work on a cause I believed in at a company that helped me fulfill some of my dreams.
You see, there are multiple ways to build towards your dreams. In my case (at Meta) I got to build my dreams while helping someone else (Zuck) build his dream, and while other people (my colleagues) got to build their dreams too.
(perhaps not what you were expecting there - you can still start a business if it’s your dream)
The real question(s)
It all comes back to a small subset of questions…
What are your dreams?
Are you working towards those dreams?
Or
Have you forsaken your dreams, and given up on yourself?
Are you caught up, building someone else’s dreams at the cost of yours?
The important thing is to have some dreams and make them big. Remember life is short and you only get one shot at it - so aim to make the most of it. Next, work towards those dreams.
And working towards your dream can be done in multiple ways, you just need to ensure that while you’re helping some build their dreams, you are also able to help build yours too.
Fin.
And there we go, another Friday we spent together. Not physically, but philosophically.
Wishing you all a great weekend.
I’m hoping to get out sailing in some terrible weather. Wish me luck.
Best wishes
John